I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
