OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
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