Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
There's always time for handjobs
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize