Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Randomize
