You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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