So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
