I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Randomize
