I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
