and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
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