In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
