There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Randomize
