So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
