question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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