thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
How's work?
Spinning.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Randomize
