left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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