who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
high people should be assigned attendants
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize