when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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