Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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