She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
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