wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I am available for nakedness
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
