do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
