I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
