then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize
