If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
