I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
