big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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