pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
