wakey wakey hands off snakey
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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