My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
