Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Randomize
