Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
