I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
