Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
