you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
