I'm going to rape someone's good day.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
There are leaves in my underwear?
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
