Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
We got so high we made milksteak
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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