We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Let's paint friendship bongs
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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