I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize