at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
