I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
You've changed since you got that strap on
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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