that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
