no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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