omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
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