I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
