I'm jealous of your bromance
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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