what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
