Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
True but thats because hes a fetus.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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