i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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