Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
