He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
