Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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